27 July 2009


It’s not true, what they say about the smell of babies, or if it is, it’s a universal illusion perpetuated by a shampoo commercial.

In the dark, I kiss your small, hard, delicate head. I cup it in the palm of my hand and press my lips firmly against your temple, linger longer than is necessary, as though I could sink this message down into the roiling quicksand of your subconscious.

... love ...

I lob these words into your slumber, the sounds reverberating incomprehensibly: I love you, whispered furiously, like force could crack the shell and release their slippery innards, leak them into your dreams.

Your hair does not smell like baked bread, or clean sunshine or talcum powder – it smells of nothing. I inhale the absence of smell, breathing the warmth back into your hair. It contains a slight, melting whiff of the dinner we cooked earlier which, if anything, accentuates the perfect, nothing smell of you.

Love: I’m unlearning the words to every meaning I know.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey Jack,

It's Paul here. I want to tell you how nice it was to see you the other day! It was also really great to meet Bruce and your wonderful little Hartley! I hope I didn't seem out of sorts, because nothing could have been further from the truth. A little in shock, yes, but in the best possible way.

It really was great to see you with such a beautiful family, looking happy and well. Both Rosalie and I are really happy that you were comfortable coming over to visit. I wish that Sophia had realized that she had an opportunity to visit her mom. Atik certainly knew it was you. He had a big dumb Atik smile on his face the whole time you were holding him.

I do want to apologize for a. being unkempt and b. the state of the house. Recent times have been difficult, as Rosalie mentioned, but life remains good nevertheless. Please know that you, Bruce and Mr. Hartley are welcome here anytime. If ever you want to drop me a line, please do so.

I can still be reached via paulcompton2003 at yahoo dot ca.

All the best, Jackie. You deserve it.